10 Days In, What's Actually Changed?

Hey friend! Happy Holidays!

You made it through 10 days of looking at your leadership patterns—the reactive moments, the communication gaps, the energy drains, the feedback you've dodged.

But here's the uncomfortable truth: awareness without application is just interesting information.

The question isn't what you learned. It's what you're going to do differently starting tomorrow.

Here is a recap of day 1 - 9

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Day 1 Challenge | Name it to Tame it: Notice the first emotion you feel today. Name it. Delay your response for 10 seconds. Then choose your next move intentionally and with clarity. (If you need more than 10 seconds, please take the pause.)

Day 2 Challenge | Own Your Triggers: Identify one trigger that keeps getting the best of you. Write down the story you attach to it… and rewrite it.

Day 3 Challenge | Watch your words: Today's Challenge: Before your next high-stakes conversation, pause and ask yourself: What exactly needs to be said here? Then say it—clean, direct, and fully aligned.

Day 4 Challenge | Impact Gap: Close One Impact Gap: Pick one interaction today—a meeting, a check-in, a piece of feedback and focus entirely on how it's landing, not just what you're saying.

Day 5 Challenge | You're not stuck: Catch Yourself in One Habit That Keeps Repeating and Choose the Opposite Action

Day 6 Challenge | Regulate Early, Not After the Blowup: Track Your Emotional Cues Today and Intervene Early

Day 7 Challenge | Have the Conversation You've Been Avoiding

Day 8 Challenge | Audit Your Energy Drains and Protect One Boundary

Day 9 Challenge | Get Curious About the Pattern. Pick one piece of feedback you've heard more than once and lean into it with genuine curiosity.

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Day 10 - you have made it!

THIS WAS NEVER JUST ABOUT "BEING NICER."

Emotional intelligence isn't about suppressing your reactions or becoming overly accommodating. It's about having options when it matters most.

Over the past 10 days, you've been building your EQ IMPACT® competencies—IN REAL TIME—that separate reactive leaders from intentional ones:

Self-Discovery - Noticing your triggers, patterns, and the gap between how you think you show up and how others experience you

Emotional Mastery  - Choosing your response instead of defaulting to your wiring, especially when the stakes are high

Social Intelligence - Reading the room, understanding impact, and recognizing what's actually happening beneath the surface

Relationship Building - Having the hard conversations, giving and receiving feedback, and maintaining trust when things get messy

Every challenge over these 10 days connected to one of these areas. The pattern interruption work? Self-management. The communication impact gaps? Social awareness. The feedback reception? All four working together.

HERE'S WHAT ACTUALLY MATTERS:

High emotional intelligence doesn't mean you never get triggered, never misread a situation, or never struggle with difficult feedback. It means you recognize it faster and recover better.

The leaders with strong EQ aren't perfect—they're just more honest about their patterns and more committed to doing something about them.

Write it down. Then answer:

• What will you do differently this week?

• Who will hold you accountable?

• How will you measure whether it's actually changing?

Not "I'll try to be more self-aware." That's vague and unmeasurable.

Try this: "When I feel frustration rising in team meetings, I'll pause for 5 seconds before responding. I'll ask my team lead to flag when I'm visibly reactive. I'll track how many times I successfully pause versus react over the next two weeks."

HERE'S THE REALITY:

Leadership development isn't a 10-day sprint. It's ongoing work. You'll backslide. You'll have days where you're fully reactive, where you avoid the hard conversation, where you show up depleted.

That's not failure. That's the work.

The leaders who create real change aren't the ones who never struggle—they're the ones who notice when they're off track and course-correct quickly.

REFLECTION QUESTIONS:

• Which day's challenge hit hardest for you—and why?

• What's one pattern you've already started to shift?

• What's the one change that would make you the leader your team actually needs?

Take your one committed change. Put it in your calendar. Share it with someone who will ask you about it in two weeks.

And then do the work.

With gratitude and impact,

Nicole F. Smith, CEO/Founder, JMS Creative Leadership Solutions

Creator of the EQ Impact® Framework

P.S. HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YOU AND YOURS!

Cheers to 2026.

This past year changed me—not "new me" transformation, but deeper clarity on what actually creates lasting change for leaders and organizations.

That clarity is driving everything I'm building for next year: new services and products designed for real transformation, not just awareness. Individual growth. Organizational impact. Both.

If you're ready to do the work, let's go.

Before You Go — A Quick Note

If you’re thinking about bringing EQ Impact® into your organization or want to work with me directly…

My 2026 calendar is already filling up.

Now is the time to connect.

Let’s talk about your goals, your people, and the emotional stamina your organization needs to thrive.

Thank you for being part of this journey with me. This isn’t just my story — it’s ours.

Together, we’re building leaders, including yourself, to lead with courage, compassion, and emotional brilliance.

Want to set up some time? Let's talk: Click here!

Leaders choose to work with me and my team because we don’t just talk strategy. We build emotionally intelligent leaders who lead with clarity, presence, and purpose.

You're receiving this email because you’re not interested in performing leadership. You’re here to practice it.

You booked a call, joined an event, or signed up because something in you said, it’s time to lead differently. You’re ready to create a life and business rooted in who you are—not in outdated rules or titles that never fit. And we’re here to help you do exactly that—with emotional intelligence at the center.